Revealing the cage (jobs-consumption-entertainment) and straitjacket strategies (3 of 8)

Awareness and awakening is necessary before people see the need for change. Hopefully you are now convinced that we, as a society, are transitioning into another era, where exponential technology is at its core.  The next chapters show that you can choose for flying out instead of fitting in. And that you have the power to build your own future as a pilot, rather than as a passenger in someone else’s plane. Love for yourself and learning to reactivate your capabilities are doable steps to take. You can start small and make them bigger over time. 

Because our capabilities have been suppressed there is a void, and that void is filled with consumption, addiction and entertainment on one part (of the void) and the other part is filled with the thoughts and emotions of others (living someone else’s life).  Suppression of capabilities is used to enforce fitting in. Suppression, leads to distortion, negligence, ignorance, and misuse of mental, emotional, spiritual and sometimes even of physical capabilities. Many leaders don’t want people to think, feel and believe in themselves. People then confuse their own thoughts with that of the suppressor. They become blurred. At school I was thinking how my father would think if I would get a low grade. I copied his behavior towards myself.

The cage

How did this happen? How did we get into this situation where others are constantly telling us what to do? Let’s getting started with the caged bird syndrome. “When you open the door for a bird which has not had its spirit crushed not its heart broken, it will immediately fly towards the door. However, a “trained” bird knows better than to fly away when this happens. At the very least, it will stand for a second, as if contemplating and hesitating whether or not to cross through the open door. The same can be said of some domesticated pets such as dogs and cats. When you open the door to let them out, they will often just stand still for a second. They have stayed within the prison called home for so long that they do not know how to function in the real world. Initially, they will be excited to be out. They will fly from place to place in a flurry of excitement. However, the excitement will unexpectedly quickly die out. The animal is confused, and once the allure of surprise wears off, an interesting phenomenon occurs. If the animal is properly domesticated and yet has been seriously hurt before (in physical form), it will always respond in an appropriate manner. It will eventually return to its home, or birdcage, or doghouse in a mechanical way, regardless of how much it despises that place. Why is this? This Caged Bird Syndrome is something I have seen in both my dreams and in real life. It is a fear of leaving a prison or the continual return to an object of paralysis and often contempt. More precisely, it is the choosing of a limit to personal independence in order to create a sufficient amount of personal safety. I believe this disorder is exceedingly common, especially among adults caught up in the corporate net of bureaucracy. We all cling to prisons that promise us a glimpse of safety in exchange for the deterioration of our inner selves. I use the word “cling” intentionally as we seem to believe that we are suspended over a wide chasm and that if we let go, we are doomed to a fate comparable with death: uncertainty. Uncertainty is the root of fear, which is in turn the root of death. The caged bird is given a chance at freedom in the same aspect that we are always given the chance to let go at any time. However, having fallen before, it knows the fear of gravity, the fear of unknown and uncompromisable forces. It does not remember the details, but instead remembers the experience as a harsh and indescribable terror that seems to last a lifetime. And so it hides from this fear of the unknown in the only way it knows how: By clinging to assured suffocation.”

Just as the bird has to find the courage to let go of the branch in order to fly, so we also must let go of our branches if we are to know the exhilaration of soaring to the highest potential of our life. The branches we hold to are our inner attachments - our beliefs, ideas and memories. And then there are the outer attachments - people, possessions, positions and privileges are a few. But as long as we hold on to them we will live in fear (of letting go and loss) and we will never be free. And just watch those birds, by letting go of one branch they are able to spend the rest of their life alighting on a million other branches, and they enjoy the view from each. Are you flying and soaring in your life, or are you stuck on one branch, cursing others as they fly past? Go on, try it ...let go! ~ Mike George

Earlier Vincent van Gogh mentioned the caged bird that is us. “This is quite a different kind of idle man; you may if you like take me for such a one. A cage bird in spring knows quite well that he might serve some end; he feels well enough that there is something for him to do but he cannot do it. What is it? He does not remember too well. Then he has some vague ideas and says to himself, “The others make their nests and lay their eggs and bring up their little ones,” and so he knocks his head against the bars of the cage. But the cage remains and the bird is maddened by anguish. “Look at the lazyanimal,” says another bird that passes by, “he seems to be living at his ease.” Yes, the prisoner lives and he does not die, there are no outwards signs of what passes within him; his health is good, he is more or less gay when the sun shines. But then comes the season of migration bringing attacks of melancholia. “But he has got everything he wants,” say the children that tend him in his cage, while he looks through the bars at the overcast sky, where a thunderstorm is gathering and he inwardly rebels against his fate. “I am caged, I am caged, and you tell me I do not want anything, fools! You think I have everything I need! Oh! I beseech you, liberty, so that I can be a bird like other birds!”

In the Industrial Age, most people are caged (in factories, companies; in jobs) and the door is closed.  We are now in a period of time, where the door is permanently open.  However, most stay inside (in their comfort zone) and more and more people take the opportunity to escape. Ira Israel says it very eloquently; “I would argue that in Western civilization, most of children’s interaction with adults entail some form of behavior modification, with rewards and punishments. We could even say that we tame children in much the same way that we tame pets in our culture. Children want to sleep when they are tired, eat when they are hungry, defecate when they need to defecate, and play when they feel playful. But fairly soon after birth we put them on schedules with designated feeding times, sleep times, and play times; when they get to school there are even designated bathroom breaks. But that is not the bad part; the bad part is that we primarily train them to be productive members of society through negative language: “ Don’t stick your tongue into the socket.” “Don’t eat with your hands.” “Don’t wake Mommy before six o’clock.” “Don’t run into traffic.” “Don’t poop in your diapers anymore.” “Don’t get bad grades.” “ Don’t do drugs.” “Don’t play with your genitals.” “ Don’t … don’t … don’t …”

And then we wonder why there is an epidemic of “negative self-talk” and “low self-esteem” in our culture (How to survive your childhood now that you’re an adult ~ Ira Israel).”

Humans are intentionally domesticated to operate in a cage, the cage of the loop between jobs, consumption and entertainment. Later I will explain what the main straitjacket strategies are that are being used to enforce us in that cage. It is a loop, because people need a job (and the accompanying salary) to pay for their consumption. They also use consumption for buying substances and behaviors to escape the stress and the empty feeling (the void) in the cage. Entertainment is used to literally escape temporarily from the cage, for example people go dancing for a weekend, where they use pills to keep going. Inthis cage we are running faster and fasteron thehedonic treadmill. "It's one of the most depressing findings in happiness research. It says that we eventually adapt to whatever good things happen to us. You get a raise... and then you take it for granted. New car? You'll take that for granted eventually, too (William Irvine, Guide to the Good Life).“ This hedonic treadmill manifests itself via phrases such as “I’ll be happy when I have a better … home, job, relationship, salary, vacation, automobile.” So, continuously you are urged to keep on consuming more to feel better. To keep you ‘hungry’ you will get occasionally rewarded while being in the cage with promotion, bonuses, parties, events, a Christmas package, a raise. Ryan Holiday says: “When we are young and ambitious we are susceptible to what psychologists would call the belief in “conditional happiness.” That if we get this, earn that, win this, get promoted to that, marry this or sleep with that, we will suddenly be happy. That we will suddenly feel good about ourselves if we get this good thing. It’s only with time and the good fortune required to get those things that we begin to understand that this is a seductive and unreachable mirage. As soon as we get those things, we want other things—or they turn out to be disappointing or complicated. We expect that they will be free of our current problems but they aren’t because we bring our problems to them (and create new problems along with them).”

Consumption is also falsely stimulated through planned obsolescence. Planned obsolescence, or built-in obsolescence, in industrial design and economics is a policy of planning or designing a product with an artificially limited useful life, so it will becomeobsolete (that is, unfashionable or no longer functional) after a certain period of time (Wikipedia). 

People are using consumption and entertainment to escape from the empty feeling of the void. The void is there because we live someone else’s life and feel not good enough, and not loved.The more pressure from the job, the more people will use consumption and entertainment to compensate for the stress.

More and more the extremes of how the cage is functioning are being exposed, and especially how (some of) those in power misuse their position. Absolute power corrupts. Sexual harassment is a sign of the broken system in the cage, the deficit of having too much power over other people. The #MeToo campaign on Twitter shows how widespread the misuse is. Whistleblowers used to be silenced and fired, but now they are listened to. In any kind of organization, the cage could lead to misuse. This does not only happen in business. I know people who are misusing their perception of spirituality to indoctrinate and manipulate others. In NGO’s (Oxfam; Plan) who do operate in developing countries there are reports of bringing in child prostitutes for parties and other misuse of funds and power. 

It is very challenging to be in the cage. The pressure to perform is getting higher by the day. People have therefor developed some coping mechanism to make life more bearable for them. The focus is on increasing their sense of pleasure to cope with the stress as well as with the void. Suppression hurts. That is why people use painkillers to soften the pain. And use sugar to sweeten their hurt. Suppression works like holding a ball under water. There is only a limited time you can do that, before your muscles get tired and the ball bursts or erupts. I think that prolonged suppression is also a cause of burn out and worse, depression. It is no luxury to set boundaries (if at all) for suppression. It costs a lot of energy to comply, to keep your capabilities suppressed. That is why many people lack energy. This lack of energy is also caused by eating unhealthy processed foods and by a lack of sleep. And then it is hard to undo the suppression and retrain. Many people don’t want to do that investment in themselves.Pleasure means to please. That is what people do to themselves as well as to others, and that leads to sub-optimization. You think that you feel better, but that feeling vanishes very quickly. 

There is a more sustainable way of dealing with the suppression and that is learning. By liberating your suppressed capabilities your capabilities will grow and there is nothing that makes you feel happier than the feeling of progress. 

Most people would choose entertainment and distraction instead of learning and growing. 

“Ordinary people seek entertainment. Extraordinary people seek education and learning.” -Benjamin Hardy

Straitjacket Strategies (for suppression)  

Here is an overview of the main strategies that companies and institutions are using to make you comply, to make you conform with their goals and ideals. Suppression is the goal of straitjacket strategies, so you do what others want you to do, to obey their rules. Suppression manipulates you in such a way that you mindlessly obey. And mindless obedience leads to putting your mental, emotional and spiritual capabilities to sleep. They become dormant. 

Perfection or chasing the rainbow

Perfection is the (unattainable) goal that they keep in front of you. You have to strive for perfection, even while you know that what you do is never good enough. In that way you keep on running and trying to perform better and better. 

“Perfection is nothing more than a deep existential angst that says, again and again, “I am not good enough and I will never be good enough.” ~ Elizabeth Gilbert 

In his book, The Paradox of Choice: Why More is Less, Barry Schwartz describes research as it relates to consumerism – and the findings indicate that people with perfectionist tendencies often have higher stress levels and are at greater risk for depression. In his view, a true perfectionist is always looking to get better but realizes that perfectionis unattainable. Dr. Paul Hewitt, a researcher who has spent 20+ years researching perfectionism at York University, agrees that there’s a difference between “the desire to excel and the desire to be perfect.” The former can be healthy so long as it’s mapped to life goals while the latter is a “vulnerability factor for unipolar depression, anorexia and suicide”. The research backs this overwhelmingly.

In a network meeting I heard a life coach say that being a perfectionist has to do with a lack of love: from myself and from others. You are constantly trying to prove yourself and wanting approval, acceptance and love from others. That is an illusion that you are chasing, as what you do will never be perfect in the eyes of others. The Science of Happiness course (UC Berkeley) lists as most toxic thoughts: 1. Perfectionism 2. Social comparison 3. Materialism 4. Maximizing. 

What you will see is that that business and government actually stimulate all these 4 activities. Eric Barker in his newsletter from 15 January 2018 shares the perspective of Albert Ellis, the famous psychologist, on being perfect. 
Here's how Albert describes it:“I must not fail at important tasks and if I do it’s terrible and I can’t stand it.”Again, you don't always realize this is your underlying belief. If I asked, "Are you human and prone to error?" You'd say yeah. But then you make a mistake and totally freak out. Does not compute.If you really believed you were prone to error, you might be a little disappointed. You'd prefer to always get the A+. But you wouldn't be surprised and get overly emotional. Remember, you don't get angry when broken toasters act like broken toasters. You get angry when you expect broken toasters to act like working toasters.And getting rid of your perfectionist beliefs doesn't mean you're suddenly going to become a slacker who half-asses everything. You can still be persistent. You just don't have to hold silly beliefs that drive you nuts. Here's Albert:
Searching for perfect solutions often will lead to stagnation and frustration. Perseverance, tolerance for less than perfection (but striving for it), the pursuit of improvement, and commitment to doing the very best you can, all are healthy, and most likely to yield the best results. Eliminating unreasonable demands for perfect solutions in no way reduces your commitment to doing or being the very best you can do or be.And if that's not enough, research says perfectionism can kill you:
Consistent with our hypotheses, findings demonstrated that risk of death was significantly greater for high scorers in perfectionism and neuroticism, compared to low scorers at the time of base line.So how do you deal with that pesky need to always be the best? Again, you have to dispute the underlying belief. Next time you're aiming for 110% and getting worked up, take notice.Ask yourself if the belief is rational (nope) and replace it with something more realistic: "I'm going to work on the project for the next three hours and do my best. The amount of effort I expend is under my control but people's reaction to it isn't."

So, what can you do if you want to grow and at the same time don’t want to be perfect? The Stoics already said millennia ago: You don’t have to be perfect, just be better than yesterday. I like that approach as it makes your life better by the day.

You will see that, during your life, you are influenced by more than one of the six straitjacket strategies. You can compare it to being stung by wasps. You can be stung by one or two wasps, that is uncomfortable, but most people are stung by three or more wasps. That is very painful and can even be life-threatening. That is the case with these straitjacket strategies and it becomes clear why the level of addiction and mental health problems is so high. These straitjacket strategies cover all aspects of the cage (jobs, consumption, entertainment). 

The result of suppression is a fixed mindset and a lack of self-esteem (you feel not good enough). Suppression is like a flower that is kept in a dark room with limited space and poor soil. The flower remains in the bud, it can’t blossom. When you bring the flower into the light, give it water and nutrients in the soil, and then it will grow and flourish. Think progress, not perfection as Ryan Holiday says in The Obstacle is the Way.

Straitjacket Strategies	Who	Focus	How	Fear of Loss
Doom	Religions; Spiritual Organizations	Obedience; Conformity	Heaven or Hell	Future; Meaning
Subordination	Army; Repressive Regimes; Education; Business; Parents	Obedience; Conformity; Measurement	Command & Control; Not good enough; Force	Life; Freedom; Salary; Job; Love
Inadequacy Marketing	Business	Incompleteness	Greed; Vanity; Insecurity	Identity; Belonging
Bread & Circuses	Government; Business	Consumption; Entertainment	Distraction; Addiction	Health; Status
Attention Control	Media: Social Networks	Time; Data	Social validation	Missing out; Approval
Conflating Pleasure & Happiness	Business; Government	Consumption	Addiction; Debt	Meaning; Belonging

The freedom to fly out

In sharp contrast to the religious and conservative worldview of obedience and submission, the worldview of freethinkers and progressives at its best is one that exalts freedom and liberty - freedom to make our own choices, freedom of the mind to travel and explore wherever it will. These are our commandments: Think for yourself and don't blindly bow down to the claims of another. Exercise your own best judgment. Ask questions and investigate whether what you've been taught is true. There have been countless wars and devastations because people were too eager to subordinate their will and conscience to the ruling authorities, but as Sam Harris says, no atrocity was ever committed because people were being too reasonable, too skeptical, or too independently minded. If anything, human beings have always been too eager to obey and to subordinate their will to others. The more we throw off that ancient and limiting mindset, the more freedom we have to think, act and speak as we choose, the more humanity as a whole will prosper. 

A recent study by researchers at the University of Birmingham found "that employees with higher levels of autonomy in their work reported positive effects on their overall well-being and higher levels of job satisfaction.

When you have become aware of the straitjacket strategies it becomes clear that you are invited to liberate yourself.